Everyone wants to know, but not many know how to ask, or dare to ask
This might end up quite long, so here’s the TL;DR
“Much to the confusion of many, I’m a straight man who like to crossdress as a woman some of the time, but not all of the time. This appears to be true of the majority of crossdressing men – but you tend not to see or hear from them”
— Me in Boy-mode
Plenty to unpick here!
The first thing to say is this: “People are complicated”™. If you try to pigeon-hole them, you’ll find that they don’t really fit into neat little categories – however inconvenient that may be.
Next, it can help to separate out some things which are often confusingly conflated – especially by those who wish to deny the complexity of the human condition and place limits upon what is “acceptable”, thus casting anything outside of that into some sort of “deviancy” or to classify it all as “imaginary” or even mental illness.
Sex
Biological traits that are associated with being male or female
This is itself complicated by many genetic edge-cases[3]
Whilst the biology (at the genetic level) is not changable, the physical presentation (genitalia, body shape & other secondary sexual characteristics) can be changed through hormones and surgery.
Gender
Cultural meanings attached to being masculine & feminine.
Separate this out from the biological traits and things can make more sense in terms of the choices people make.
A crossdresser who does not wish to undergo a transition will adopt different gender characteristics (whether part time or full time) but not generally attempt permanent physical changes.
Sexuality
Sexual attraction, practices, and identity (which may or may not align with sex/gender).
Separate this out from the previous two, and avoid making assumptions. If in doubt, ask – people are generally happy to explain. It may seem counterintuitive but the majority of crossdressers appear to identify as heterosexual. Over 80% according to one study[4] but this study may be unreliable.
A good place to start is the youtube channel of Alice in Black. If you’ve got seven minutes to spare, this video[1] is an excellent introduction.
There is a paucity of academic studies about crossdressing – notably a 1972[2] study and a 1992[4] study made (deliberately) along similar lines and with one of the authors in common between the two studies.
It appears to be a significantly under-researched area, and many of the few extant studies seem to lack the rigour of full scientific method.
This is, perhaps, not that surprising when one looks at how recently crossdressing was de-criminalised(!) in some parts of the world, and how recently it was considered an illness which needed to be treated in many places. It is a shame, however, because some actual data would be fascinating.
I can say a few things though.
A non-trivial proportion of men have tried it to some extent. But they tend not to talk about it.
A large proportion of men who do crossdress do it only in their own homes in private – never venturing out in public. And this is understandable; with the common assumption that crossdressing equates to homosexuality – a label many heterosexual men would feel uncomfortable about, plus maybe feelings of shame associated with wearing female attire, and with the toxic attitudes & myths promulgated by many populist politicians, and alleged newspapers.
Having discovered the paucity of research, let alone good research, in this area, I did a little informal polling of my own which gives an interesting picture – although this is not rigorously scientific by any means. Some interesting avenues for research to be explored maybe.
It takes some real nerve to venture forth en femme and not everyone can face it, or has personal circumstances conducive to trying it even if they have the nerve.
To do it successfully requires quite a lot of patience, skill, and “stuff” – from clothing to shoes to makeup to wigs. And this isn’t about “passing”, it’s about feeling comfortable in your own skin but in a different persona. If you don’t have that feeling, you’ll not cope with the looks and the giggles that are inevitable for those of us not in our 20s with fantastically slim bodies and perfect wrinkle-free skin.
Of course, with practice it becomes much less daunting, and once you’ve done it in front of friends and colleagues, it is barely scary at all – except in unfamiliar areas and circumstances.
Some media coverage is a little more thoughtful than pure sensationalism. This article[5] from 2011 starts off a bit “showbiz” but then flows into a more thoughtful analysis. And the assertion that something like 2 million men in the UK crossdress to some extent, which fits within the ranges discussed in other place as between 2% to 10% of men.
So, a complicated area indeed. And in some societies & cultures even more so – the concept of the Bacha Posh[6] is well worth reading a little about, as is Third Gender[7], should you want to know more.
Questions, as ever, welcomed!
Footnotes, References, Links
[0] https://othersociologist.com/sociology-of-gender/
[1] Alice in Black youtube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@AliceInBlackX
An introductory video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gfQIYvAbV0Q
[2] Unfortunately, somewhat elusive. Data from this study can be found in [4], however.
[3] These are generally rare genetic conditions (although the first one is surprisingly common – many people who carry this never know it) which show that the simplistic “XX=Female, XY=Male, and there is nothing else” quoters are just that – simplistic. Real life is a lot more complicated, even at the genetic level.
- XYY syndrome affecting approximately 1 in 1,000 males – 0.1%!
- XX male syndrome thought to affect approximately 1 in 20,000-30,000 males
- XXYY syndrome affecting approximately 1 in 18,000–40,000 males
- XXXY syndrome affecting approximately 1 in 50,000 males
- XXXXY syndrome affecting approximately 1 in 85,000-100,000 males
- XYYY syndrome extremely rare, unknown prevelance
- XYYYY syndrome extremely rare, below 1 in 1,000,000
[4] 1972 Study (referencing and comparing data with earlier 1972 Study) https://citeseerx.ist.psu.edu/document?repid=rep1&type=pdf&doi=0c99ae33500cfb97ff016f11f4ce2bc7471abf43
[5] https://www.express.co.uk/expressyourself/226113/Why-so-many-men-dress-in-frills
Sophie Baskerville 